Opinion: you can’t always go back


It starts with Tory Burch, then Ferragamo, and never ends. 

Some background, I am happily married for 9 years, have 5 beautiful children and earn 400K a year – me and my wife collectively. 

I come from a simple, regular family where we bought Adonis shirts for $25 and went to the hat box for suits. 

“it’s just fascinating how Tory Burch landed us at Chanel.”

My wife as well, dressed well but not expensive. They are not mutually exclusive. 

My wife’s high-end shoes were Tory Burch shoes that she bought on sale for about $175. They were comfortable, nice and did the job. 

Then came ferragamo, first bought on sale for $220, but when they got worn out, my wife loved them so much that she “needed them” again. Now however they cost $350. B”H money is not an issue but this became a necessity. 

Fast forward 5 years and now a pair of Chanel flats is needed every season. They are so comfortable and classy – I don’t doubt that, it’s just fascinating how Tory Burch landed us at Chanel. 

Another point is the kids. My daughter can’t have a basic coat while my wife has Moncler. What message are we sending the kids? What will happen when she gets married? Will she be able to live modestly like other young couples or will she have to shop at high-end retailers that offer payment plans?

It’s hard to make money, but it’s even harder living the way you did prior to making the money. 

I am sure Women reading this are nodding in agreement. It seems impossible to ‘turn back’ once you up the designer ladder, you can’t go back. 

“will she have to shop at high-end retailers that offer payment plans?”

If it’s up to me, we would not be shopping this way. But it’s a battle not worth fighting. Tried and failed. 

I am doomed, You were warned 🙂 

Your friend, 

Obviously anonymous. 

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinion or position of GreaterLakewood.

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  1. Maybe you aren’t providing the same level of attention and pride to your wife that she can get from wearing expensive clothing.

    Just a thought

  2. You are worried about what will happen when your daughter gets married, yet it is a battle “not worth fighting”? Unless you are able to support your daughter and her eventually family, you should be worried, very worried. It is hard enough to get a shidduch, but not you are limiting her to someone who will be earning $400k or more, or has very wealthy parents. Her future options are very limited, and likely lead to a life of high stress and Shalom Bayis problems.

    “It seems impossible to ‘turn back’ once you up the designer ladder, you can’t go back. ” Interesting, some of the wealthiest people I know don’t wear or care about designer labels. To them, being wealthy means convenience, they can shop wherever and whenever they want without having to wait for sales or look at the labels, for price, or brand. It seems those who are truly wealthy, don’t feel the need to advertise it by the clothing they wear.

    As a matter of fact, I was once invite to a meal from by an extremely wealthy well known philanthropist at a hotel in E”Y, he was upset because they ordered to much water for the meal. It might seem strange to some, but that is how many wealthy people became rich, by not wasting, watching their expenses and gaining a competitive advantage over others because of it.

  3. A study of the Forbes 400 (the 400 wealthiest people) revealed that over 75% of the wealthiest said that their “secret” to wealth was simple—— spend LESS than you earn! Brilliance, no?


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